Sweden Keeps Russian Submarines Out With Dancing Gay Sailor

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Sweden found a hilarious way to keep Russian submarines out of their waters–and apparently, it’s working!

After reports that Russian submarines were infiltrating Swedish waters earlier in the year, Sweden put up some very gay underwater “Keep Out!” signs on the edge of their territorial waters.

That’s gay in the literal sense: Sweden’s new keep out signs feature the silhouette of a sailor–clad only in a pair of briefs and a sailor hat–whose hips gyrate back and forth. The words, in Russian, “Welcome to Sweden: Gay Since 1944,” which is the year Sweden legalized homosexuality, emblazon the top of the sign.

Sweden is also sending out gay propaganda–which is both illegal and taboo in Russia–via Morse code, in hopes that Russian submarines will choose to stay far away from Swedish waters, rather than have their crews exposed to something Russia considers illegal and immoral.

The idea isn’t to promote gay issues–although Sweden is one of the most liberal countries on gay rights–but rather to solve the problem of Russian military aggression creatively. Because Sweden is not part of NATO and has a very small military, it’s options for dealing with Russian aggression through force are extremely limited.

Sweden’s gay defense strategy makes a direct reference to the anti-gay laws passed in Russia over the past few years. A controversial law was bans education to children about “non-traditional sexual relations.” That law’s been extrapolated to apply in a number of public settings–severely curtailing the public freedoms that gays in Russia had once enjoyed.

Sweden installed the signs on April 27, and they report that there haven’t been any submarine sightings since then. But, to be safe, Sweden also announced that they would be dramatically increase defense spending in response to Russian aggression.

Candice Thomas
Candice has almost 20 years of experience reporting for various conservative publications. When she's not writing, she enjoys being outdoors--especially camping, hiking, and hunting. She lives in Harrisburg, PA, with her husband.